Friday, May 1, 2009

Sloth in a Tarpit- a personal experience


If you've ever thought to yourself, "Hey I wonder what running 18.64 miles would feel like?"
You can call me. If you want I will pretend that it was euphoric and horses ran wild through mountainous fields, my feet flew like pegasus, and other mythical ideas I like to pretend about running.

Honestly, I felt like a sloth in a tarpit. Even though there were horses running through fields and sheep bleeting plaintively, I can't say that it made me feel excited to run 8 more miles (7.56 miles to be exact). I am not exactly oozing confidence for this dumb marathon I'm supposed to run in 3 weeks. Oh wait, make that 2 weeks. Two. Weeks. I'm kind of hoping I contract Swine flu. No I am not. I am feverishly knocking on wood and taking that back.

Anyway here's a sampling of my thoughts throughout the Strider's Winter Racing Circuit 30K (18.64 miles). I ran it with, well for 11 miles at least, Cristina and Leah and they made it much more bearable. I finished in 2:42:29, to average 8:42 pace. I'm pretending that pace was actually 8:30 pace because all of those dumb water stops I made.

Mile 1: I feel good. I feel great. I feel wonderful. 6 miles times three. Not too bad. I can do it. Can I think of enough things to say for 18 miles? What if there's just an awkward running silence between Cristina and Leah and I? Maybe I'll tell a story about Blaisdell.
Mile 7: Alright. Alright. "Romeo something, something, never have to be alone. I said I love you and something." Sorry Leah. I really didn't mean to spit on you. I am so sorry. I will wash your tights. Good thing you are wearing tights because that would feel nasty on your bare leg. I am so sorry.
Mile 10: These shoes are toast. I really, really want new shoes. "Romeo, romeo." Stupid Taylor Swift. That is not a running song. My back hurts.
Mile 11: I think I will stop right here and stretch my aching back. Goodbye Leah. Goodbye Cristina. Your backs look nice in that blue jacket and pink shirt. I will catch you in 3 miles.
Mile 14: No I will not catch you. I will stop at every aid station and consume massive quantities of water, resulting in a bouncing stomach. 5Ks. I'm going back to 5Ks.
Mile 16: Does this never end? How can I get this stupid song out of my head? OH look there's Mike. Just pretend everything is alright. I'm glad Hannah loves me so much that she wails my name everytime I run by. Kenzie, your smile as I see you makes me so happy.
Mile 18: Okay the finish line is any time now, anytime now. "It's a love story and something, Romeo." Dang song. Curse this wrap-around finish. Curse it! But silently, not out loud like you did during the half marathon. Silently cursing.
Mile 18.64: Alright a free hat. Mmmm, donuts. Mmmm. More donuts. Mmmm just one more donut. No, Hannah I cannot hold you right now. I am a sloth in a tar pit.

Just for the record, if I make it through this marathon I am never, never running a marathon again.

Congrats to Cristina, who was second in our age group for the overall circuit. She's a true distance runner now. :)

14 comments:

Kristina P. said...

That makes me tired! But congrats! What an amazing achievement!

Trevor said...

You are my hero. I ran the mile and a half in school and then would lean over and dry-heave for 4- or 5 times without fail. It was not because I crossed the line first. I vomit when I run. I dreaded the run every time I was forced to do it.

Charles, Kellie, Gabe and Khale said...

Congratulations! I am so impressed....yet again. I am the sloth in a tar pit, only my tar pit is my couch. (yikes!) Tell Christina congrats as well, you guys make me proud!

Loralee and the gang... said...

I love to run, but with my short little legs, 18.64 miles is pretty much doubled for me.

I'm hoping to do a half-marathon by the end of this summer. (I ran 5.8 miles today, at a 9:40 average pace. Woohoo!)
:~D

Amber said...

Can we quote you on never, ever running a marathon again or are you one of those people who forgets all the pain? :-)

Melanie J said...

"Sloth in a tar pit." Ha, ha!

Marcie said...

Well, I not sure anyone who willingly run's 18.64 miles can referr to themselves as a Sloth. I am always amazed by people who love to run. I get the bug every spring but once it get's over 82 degree's I usually quit. You are awesome.

Terresa said...

Umm, I hope I'm replying to the right person. I think you'd asked about my MLIS?

I got it from SJSU (San Jose State, CA), but never set a foot on campus -- my degree was a satellite program and my grad classes were @ SDSU, UCSD and CS Fullerton.

I love Libraries & miss the work. I quit 2 yrs ago when our baby #4 was born -- it was too much to swing at the time (my oldest was 5 and my twins were 3). I don't regret my choice to stay home, as now I've fallen into writing in a big way and I'm working on my first manuscript.

Great meeting you -- what was your MLIS focus? Mine was Youth Services. And yeah, story times rock! ;)

kristi lou said...

Nice job steph! You're amazing.

Alisha said...

I laughed so hard! I feel that way running a 5k (if that makes you feel any better:)

Kandice said...

ok stephanie, you crack me up. I guess i am glad now that I am not doing the ogden marathon. I am sticking with halves. And I would be happy to have your 8:47 mile time for the half. I think i will rejoice if I get to that! Spencer just got one of those dorky GPS watches. I actually love it, but it is quite depressing to me to see how slow I really am. ha ha. So where are you living now that you run by my parents house?

Kelly(M&M) said...

Hey Steph, I commented on Marathon Mommies too! I don't think this 18 miler shows your training. There is a reason for the taper and that is to be fresh on marathon day. Right now your legs are tired from months of training and pushing your body. I think you need to run 2 marathons before you swear them off. Plus when you qualify for Boston, you will have to run that one. :-) Trust your training. You will have a great experience at Ogden, no matter your finishing time. I can't wait to hear. How is taper going?

Anonymous said...

Run you sloth, run. GMB

Terresa said...

Thanks for asking. J or YA fantasy (probably YA though). Yeah, I'm going head to head with the greats: Diana Wynn Jones, JK Rowling, CS Lewis. It's like, deep breath, jump into the deep end of the pool.

As a Youth Services Librarian (for public libraries), I saw so much crap out there that was written & published (!!), I began thinking, "I can write stuff better than this." In time, I just may. ;)