Friday, November 18, 2011


Besides developing varicose veins that a phelbotomist would kill for, I have been developing another something that I hope will prove less painful.
I'm writing a book. I'm doing this crazy Nanowrimo thing and besides feeling completely insecure about my writing and my characters in addition to all the other things I usually feel insecure about, it's been fun. 
I have 25,000 words, which means I'm slightly behind in my word count, but I'm halfway to a goal of 50,000. I'm so goal-oriented that I'm halfway tempted to write "Blah, blah, blah" over and over for the words I'm missing, but I'm pretty sure that would not help me write the next Great American Novel. Because that is what this is. For sure. Except there's not enough Angst and Zombies. But I still have 25,000 words to go, so maybe some of that will work its way in. 
Here's my favorite excerpt:

When God was handing out talents in heaven, I imagine the scenario went something like this:
“Ahh,” he smiled down at me, “What talent would you like little one?”

Eager and anxious and nervous because there was a huge line behind me I must have forgot to ask for a useful skill. I was probably thinking about cooking, or being a good friend, or raising children, or some other unselfish and noble skill. But then I balked. Being in the presence of God must have made me jittery because I blurted out “Swimming! I want to be a good swimmer.”
I imagine that God drew his bushy, yet benevolent eyebrows together and possibly slightly frowned.

“Swimming?” He must have gently asked.

“Yes, yes. Swimming. I heard the earth is three-fourths water,” I laughed nervously, then coughed, when no one else laughed, and then nodded very seriously. “Swimming.”

God probably looked down at the blueprint for my life and thought, “Well, swimming won’t really help her with a history degree, teaching, and then three children, but, swimming it is.”
Then he smiled, made a few changes on the plan and told me to do my best.

And I am. But I sure could use a few other talents right now. My stellar swimming skills notwithstanding I think I’m drowning in motherhood. 


Sherrie said...


Michelle said...

Would you hurry up and finish and publish already so I can get a copy??

Kristen and Gang said...

It's fantastic. I can't wait. Is this the trashy romance novel that you're using the alias for or is this a different one.

charbetrichey said...

Naw, I think God knew what was happening and secretly gave you the talents that you would need. Because I see how you mother your children. I see you be a good wife. And I see you canning and doing all kinds of domestic "stuff" and you do it well. All you see is how great you swim and others see your other talents. <3 G-ma's don't lie!

Rachel Kirkaldie said...

I love it! Keep up the good work. You're almost there!

Melissa said...

I would buy a copy of your book. It sound so good!!

The Girardo Family said...

I would love to read your novel, when it comes out. I love to read your blog, it makes me laugh. So the book obviously will be goo!

Kim said...

I would read it! Keep up the good work :)